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I was almost late for class. I was doing some shallow texting.
Ever since I started this class, I completely have been unplugged. And then all of a sudden,
it was like a moment crept up and I went there again.
It all came back for a second.
Yeah, but I'm done now.
I'm good.
Cool.
Now you got to tap in and jump in and jump out once in a while.
Yeah, but I'm amazed ever since I started this sutra course, I I've been leaving the house without my cell phone.
And I've been going and doing things and I'm I feel like half kind of naked like search in my pocket looking and there's a real nice freedom to like, nobody can get interrupt me.
nobody can and it's really i'm liking it cool that's great
who else we got on the call here angelica
hi angelica
oh she's making a cup of tea right before class no i'm here
good evening hi i'm listening again
i hope you don't mind i don't mind at all i'm glad that uh i'm glad it's two o'clock at night
time i'm glad that you find it worth your while to be up at this time i think that's great
Yeah.
Sorry, I'm just trying to multitask for a second in these last few minutes.
Hey, everyone.
I'm calling in on my phone for a few minutes.
hi hey lydia i can't quite see who's there but i think i hear tracy and i hear earl
yep we got angelica on the call were you uh are you at dance class
no well no i went i took a walk to the forest but we kind of stayed longer than i anticipated
so i'll be home in about i don't know 10 10 minutes i think and then i can call it on internet
nice good for you yeah thanks hello christina
hi hi so on my call how's it going doing well how are you
oh i'm feeling like it's day eight yes like i i want it to end and don't want it to end at the
same time. Yeah, I feel you on that. Yeah, I'm very like, enamored with it. Like I can't get
enough. But at the same time, I'm like, I don't know how to turn it off. I'm just like staring
at my screen and studying all this. Yeah. Yeah. I'm looking forward to the schedule opening up a bit
as much as I've loved it all I think it's been cool to have it kind of feels like a retreat
Lydia and I were talking about this like it's hard to get work done in the day because the
my mind feels it's like in a retreat and then to switch gears and be an administrative person
it's I completely relate to that yeah it hasn't been very smooth for
you know the the four of us at YSI we're all like I don't know I can't get any work done
I'm in retreat world
yeah I definitely hear you it's day eight of retreat but it's not retreat so yeah I'm in the
boat with you guys yeah um today i don't have much of a plan because we're only looking at one verse
but i was curious maybe we could start doing something a little different i was curious what
people's biggest takeaway so far has been like what's the one thing that you're kind of chewing
or inspired by or influenced by?
Like what's the wow moment so far?
I love the, when Geshe-Law was talking about the sunglasses,
the illusion and everything, that really stuck with me.
And that verse where he was referring to, or 23, I think.
But I don't know, I feel like each day
it's getting a little bit more and more intense.
Today was very beautiful as well.
Talking about having a teacher or a llama.
Yeah.
Which kind of stuck out to me because I knew the importance,
and I know I've read that before,
but I still haven't personally felt it.
Where I'm like, oh, no, it's okay.
You don't have to have that.
Now it's like, whoa, okay.
You really do.
Yeah.
That would be a really interesting discussion for later.
Because there's, I mean, definitely that's the system Geshe Michael spiritually grew up in.
And then he really resonates with, but I think that's a good question.
Like, is that necessary?
Dulce has thoughts on it.
Cool.
We can take a deep dive into that later.
Tadre and Dulce, we're just going to share a little bit about what's been profound as a different way of reviewing.
What's been the cool takeaway so far?
The thing that's kind of been the cool thing that we've taken so far?
Great.
Delcey, what you got?
I love the, hi, by the way, everyone.
I love the, just the coming together of it.
I love the beauty of how when people come together with shared intention, that alone cultivates so much beauty.
And then especially with the intention of this and the power of people who have studied intensely in it and who have embodied a lot of that wisdom and their own essence, their own beauty.
And so it's really fun for that.
Like, I just love that aspect of it.
And I love practicing in the mornings and meeting in the evenings.
like that's kind of um a hope eventual hope that I personally have of like having some sort of or
engaging with community in that way like in person continuously and I think that would be really
beautiful so it's fun to experience that here and I'm grateful for that so thank you all for bringing
your own unique beauty yeah I think just before you logged on we were talking about that it's kind
of felt like a retreat and much more so than I thought it was going to.
It's been great that way.
Angelica, anything stuck out for you that you want to share?
Teresa?
Have you had a verse or an idea that's kind of popped out?
I actually thought that what Geshe-la said today of memorizing a verse was very cool.
So I already sent the verse to come to me.
I hope it will come.
So if any of you have ideas, you can send me.
And, well, I've been raised Catholic, so I do that a lot.
That sometimes he said before coming, how do you say, in the airplane?
How do you call it?
Take off.
Take off.
It's like automatically to say a prayer or when I'm starting driving with my family.
So I thought that was very cool too.
What is it that we had to share?
Just the birds?
No, just the idea.
What was he saying about the taking off?
He said that before taking off,
you can hear what was the...
I don't remember if it was just on Kappa
or who it or my tray singing in your mind oh automatically right yeah
like if the plane is about to crash you hear my tray or words or something like that
that's what well you you don't need to go to to just that tragic event
just before takeoff just to be safe between the clouds let's say
tracy what about you
there's so much and i'm still processing and cooking it all um i i'm just so profoundly
um blown away even just in dissecting the sanskrit and the words i had no idea that the verses
flowed the way they did. I've studied Patanjali in another yoga program, but we did not go into
the depths that we are now. And even the connection of the yamas, I had no idea tying it into life
and the yamas and like just Geshe-la dissecting these things. And it becomes this huge thing that
I end up cooking the whole day like just about you know how we would be running around biting
people's body parts off and like I never looked at the eight limbs at that depth before because I
just looked at it like ethics you know and now I just I find I can't wait to like really process
all the teachings and the stuff that we've just learned and just like Dulce I really enjoy the
whole flow of even receiving the teachings and having our community satsangs at night so I find
there's this really nice retreat sense and at the same time communal sense so I'm loving all of it
really I can't pick one thing and also as Teresa said the memorization part like I've always admired
when I hear Geshe-la recite things and things like that but the level that he talked about it today
So I too am going to move forward trying to memorize one verse at a time in hopes to get some of that under my belt.
Cool. I think we're going to have John, see if we can convince John to chant the whole thing so that we can get a tune to it.
And people can, because a lot of people have expressed interest in, you know, taking a crack at memorizing it.
and then we'll have, it's a lot easier when there's a tune in your head to go with.
That would be amazing. Sign me up.
His Sanskrit is so incredible.
Lydia, you got something?
Yeah, just had to get to the unmute.
um wow for me oh gosh there's so many takeaways so I I definitely hear when other people say
there's so many things I'm still cooking and you know I love that part I definitely resonate with
like the glasses I think the sunglasses thing will stick with me forever just kind of being
like yeah I have these pink sunglasses on damn it but I think my biggest takeaway is
the verse Hayam, Dukam, and Nagatam
because kind of, I guess,
ironically or not ironically,
I used it for my asana class
and I used it for my meditation class that I led.
And I think that it's super powerful
to think about the idea that like right now
is the moment that we have the wet cement.
Like in the past, it's, you know,
something that's already dry
and in the future while we're not there yet.
So just kind of just coming back to the most powerful moment that we have is now,
I think will really kind of resonate with me.
And it ties into the memorizing the verse.
And I don't know.
So right now, that's my biggest takeaway.
Nice.
That's cool.
I think for me it is kind of revisiting his practical application of the yamas and niyamas
and making it so like his example of killing I thought was so great like we don't go and kill
people we don't bite each other's face off so what is that how is that relevant for us I thought
the example of texting and driving was so poignant and to be in that mind frame as we go through the
and niyamas or morality or ethics in general.
And the other thing is just kind of reawakening
a love of Sanskrit and John's classes have been so great.
And hearing him chant is just so otherworldly for me.
I just love, you know, having the opportunity when he made,
he did a 10 class Sanskrit course a couple of months ago
that we videoed.
And I've studied Sanskrit before,
like three or four times with different people,
and he just brings it alive in a different way
that it's kind of turning me back on
to studying Sanskrit again.
That's been nice.
The verse we looked at is the nyama today.
So we could look at that or we could dive into the question of the,
do we need a spiritual teacher?
Maybe let's do that one first.
Because I think it's such a Tibetan paradigm.
Like when people first came to Tibet and started studying Buddhism, they called it Lamaism because the Lama was so central, even more so than the Buddha.
Like they didn't refer to it as Buddhism.
They called it Lamaism because that's the, you know, in Tibet, that was the situation was the guru was the representation of the Buddha and to treat that Lama like a Buddha.
So much so that that's how they referred to it.
The whole religion was called Lamaism.
And it's been interesting to see how that cultural thing hasn't transferred all that well into the West.
It's been incredibly problematic where people, you know, just flat out think it's wrong to give up your power to another person.
And it hasn't worked well for a lot of people.
So I don't know, is it something that will take on, take foothold in the West? Is it a good thing? Is it a bad thing? Curious what people, what's the, where do we go forward with that idea?
Tulsi, what do you got?
Okay, so personally, I feel like the idea of a teacher and teachers can be super helpful and necessary, especially as we all have our own specialties and abilities to, even if we're studying the same thing, we're perceiving it somewhat differently or sharing it somewhat differently just because of our own unique vessel.
and experience and all of that that compromises who we are and so I feel like that can be really
beneficial to learn with teachers and to share in that way um and to honor like each other in that
way like I think it's a way of honoring humanity um and how we grow and evolve as well um and then
also for me I feel like the term master and it it says the master it doesn't say a master
and so for me the master means I believe in like um God like the universe source essence uh the
original essence however people may describe that being that energy um and so to me like that's what
the master is and so I think that I could see how that relationship of someone being someone's
master in that sense or playing that role could be really beneficial um and then I think there
also comes a point where it's like oh right I saw this human embodiment of this energetic expression
I saw someone who wow their look they're like they're this is their embodiment of the creator
and how beautiful and then that person you lose that person in some way oftentimes right because
usually that person's older than you or whatever the case may be. And for me, the teaching there
is now it's time for God. Like now it's time for direct. I go direct to God. So God is my master.
Like if God says this, and I feel like also the benefit of having a human person play that role
for a while can be as well as if you're not ready to listen fully to God necessarily, or if you have
distortions, then being like, oh, just go straight to God can be dangerous because it can be like
tuning into something that's not God, but you think it's God. And then you can do stuff in the name of
God, which is actually like really not great. I would consider that to be what is like a sin or
for lack of a better word, in the name of God that is not actually aligned, I guess you could say.
Right. And so I feel like that can also happen.
So I see how that can absolutely play a role is to have that sort of person for a while.
But then once you've done enough discipline and someone is clean enough in themselves, I feel like that purity in the sense of being a pure channel of being able to receive one's own relationship with the universe, whatever you may call it, in clarity, then it's just like go straight to God.
And it's like, all right, what's God telling you to do?
Is God telling me to build this house?
All right, I'll build this house.
And to have that discipline up to that point,
to be able to do that with something
that might communicate with you in a different way
than people are accustomed to.
So that's my sort of interpretation on that
or input on that.
And I'm curious if people have perspective on that as well
or want a conversation about that.
I love to talk more too and share in that.
i'm trying not to jump in first but i'm gonna do it i i feel the opposite like it's
easier to talk to the god that's the source
and then you for me it's like i can do that first and then the human energetic manifestation of that
is the harder one because the one at the source is kind of my imagination and i can make them
perfect more easily and then the one that's in front of me it's like
it's a lot more problematic and then I go back to the imaginary one because it's easier
and try to get that strength back again to deal with the one in front of me that can be
so normal okay okay but can I say something are you okay I want to make sure I'm not interrupting
you but um so imaginary i would say that's the real right for me that's i don't know what that's
the real that's the real okay like this is the truth and okay so this is the other thing i'll
say this first and then i'll say that um so the person in front of me that's the illusion that's
coming from me right so it's like that's the one that's made up you know like that's the one that's
Like, even if that's a real person, I'm not saying that they're not having their own real
experience as well.
For me, it's like, that's the, that's the one that's like, that I could shift in my head
in some way or whatever.
That's harder to come to that direct experience of, but for that immediate direct experience,
it's like, boom.
And so you can work that way as well.
And also what I wanted to say is that, because in yoga, you talk about emptiness, right?
And I remember, I think it was Gashay Michael was saying that emptiness is always negative, right?
Like, and then I was, so I was like, hmm, interesting.
And then, so what's beyond emptiness?
Because you wish emptiness, and it's like, why is emptiness?
And am I still talking?
Did it, did it skip me?
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Come on, man.
Okay.
So, okay.
So it's what's beyond emptiness.
And I would say that's God.
And for me, like the lack of God source energy, that's emptiness.
And that's why I feel like emptiness exists because it's whatever isn't that.
It's whatever isn't that, like that, that all that is.
So that's how I feel about it.
I think the emptiness is what allows for that purity.
Instead of it needing something behind it, it's what allows for that thing, however we
conceive of it and think of it to exist.
And I agree.
Yeah, it's not like that.
I don't mean to mean like, it's my imagination
in that I don't have the capacity to interact with it.
Like my teacher, hey, how's it going?
High five.
You know, I can try to do that in my mind.
And sometimes that's hard because it's just,
it is nothing but imagination.
And sometimes those beautiful moments when it's not,
can seem few and far between.
And maybe that's the problem is like maybe kind of what you're saying,
maybe that eventually gets flipped and it's easier.
The more we try or the more we connect and the more we do have those moments
and create those moments that then it does get easier.
Because I'm curious. Okay. What I want to say, I don't want to,
I want to allow more space as well.
But what I want to say to that really quick as well is what you said around
those moments when it doesn't feel like the illusion and you feel like you're
having that moment of lucidity with someone and you're both experiencing that
sort of clarity and like,
you're both experiencing the same thing at the same time.
Is that what you're describing?
No,
I meant more like the moments when you feel like you're able to have some sort
of sense of a divine being, like not the one in front of you.
Okay.
Okay, cool.
okay Dulcina you're going to shut up now somebody else jump in
I think that um if you don't have a master or you don't have a teacher you're like a boat
spinning and you have no oars to row the boat and the teacher the master they come and they give you
that guidance that you need to help you steer the path and to keep all the yamas and you know like
just all this stuff it's like it's that guidance and then the other piece I think is um if your
teacher your master has been with you lifetime over lifetime over lifetime there's a lot of other
things where they say your your master and your guru is inside you well if you've had a master
or teacher over lifetimes, then it's already inside you. It's almost like it's a different
type of sunglasses that are revealing the master to you, like the seeds arrive and then you see
your master or you see your teacher, your heart llama or whoever and however you call it. But for
me, my experience early on in life, kind of like Teresa, I was raised in a Christian Catholic home.
So I had that and I was always seeking.
And I remember going to bed every night praying and just wanting to have that.
And then it wasn't until later on in life when I traveled all over the world and I said,
my teacher is everyone and everything.
And then all of a sudden, when a teacher shows up, it's like once you feel it and hear it
and experience it, then you just need more, especially while they're in a living source.
And so for me, it's like I found my oars and my boat is going in the right direction now.
For me, today it happened something that it has already happened to me.
It's not that I heard something new, what Keshe Allah was teaching today.
um i i already read the book of the magic how is in english the magic of the empty
teacher yeah and i loved that book and uh it's like as if today after hearing so many times
about Geshe-la talking about his teacher,
I realized that you built your teacher.
I already knew it,
that you plant the seeds to get to see your teacher.
But today it was like, I don't know,
it was like different.
It was like, okay, I really get it.
that the teacher he experienced was so different from what their colleagues at school were experiencing about him
and that the full experience and how he gets so emotional about his teacher is coming from him.
So for me today, it was like, okay, you have to plant your teacher and it has to be someone near you.
And although I feel Geshe-la is my teacher, he's very far away and that I have to plant seeds with someone that is more near me.
So for me, it was like, OK, I have to work on this and I'm and I'm like with energy to do it.
So it was like very nice.
Benji, looks like you're deep in thought, man.
Sorry, I'm late to the part.
Yeah, I got a little too deep.
Sorry.
um i something that came up for me when we were talking about the teacher was in the beginning
of chapter two he talks about um the goal which was to to recognize that there are divine beings
and then to be directed by them.
I don't know if this was already talked about.
I came on the line and Earl said divine being.
So I don't know if that was something.
And I guess like that was kind of like the invisible,
like the whispers of inspiration that come in the ear,
you know, that seems to be like, I don't know.
To me, it's always been like the way
or like the dharma that's guiding me on my process and guiding me on what I need to be
doing with my life to realize whatever I need to realize but it's never really manifested in a
teacher who's right in front of me but I really like what Tracy said about lifetime after lifetime
because I definitely had a moment when Geshe was talking where I got pretty teary-eyed and like
miss something that I didn't, you know, haven't directly experienced. So there was that.
Yeah. Thanks for letting me share.
I'm curious, like, do we need to see the teacher as a perfect being?
Like, is that something that we need to do in the path?
Take a teacher, say they're enlightened, relate to them as perfect.
Two no's so far.
Why not?
Because that's the yogic path.
That's the Buddhist path.
not perfect from their own side
not perfect from their own side but but but treating them as perfect would be the path to
seeing them as perfect and also incredibly complicated and challenging because then
you're relating to something as perfect that you don't see as perfect and that's usually problematic
which is why there's so many problems or this teacher seems to be doing something wrong and
telling me to do something that doesn't seem perfect and doesn't seem like it's in my best
interest but i'm trying to see them as perfect as a method to make them perfect
i thought that what geshela said today of always and also being careful of not doing
blindly everything that our teacher tells us it was very important too
it for me it is that if deeply in your heart you feel that it's wrong
you shouldn't do it it's not like mental it's more like like emotional and instinct
because there is when so many cases of abuse or things happen to to maintain like this awareness
if not it would be like very easy just do whatever they tell you and go like that no
yeah i think it can be very easy to just do that but then they'll start making it hard
by giving you contradictory things so that you can't just do that that's my experience
but also shouldn't we be like like they know more than us apparently so then why should i question
i'm just getting in my own way if i'm like nah i don't feel like doing that instruction that
doesn't seem right like i think of the few times in my life when i've said no to gish and michael
it's it's all never worked out like he um
there's a couple times that i've said no and he's like all right like he asked me to go to
shimdanda ashram to study and i was like i'm too busy i can't do it and then he's like all right
and then came back later and was like you should go to the shimdanda ashram
i was like i i can't and then it's like the third time was like go to the shivnan dashram i was like
all right that's three times i should probably do and it was incredibly revolutionary in my
spiritual life and there was another time with uh with the yoga sutras in new york
i was so glad that the term at diamond mountain five weeks was over everyone was leaving
geshla was leaving i could relax he was going to new york to the yoga sutras chapter four which
had already studied and he's like day two of the teachings i get a call he's like i want you to come
out i was like busy no money no thanks and then the next day somebody else called me he's like
guess someone should come out here and it's like okay i'll go out and then he like totally ignored
me the whole time i walked past wouldn't even make eye contact you know i was listening really
intensely for the the message or the point of me being there nothing and went back and was like what
what was that all about and then it was like
I got this strong sense that
it wasn't about something that was supposed to happen there it was about him
pulling me away from something that bad that would have happened if I didn't go
but all of these times like I've fought against
that even listening to my heart like what what do we do when we're on the path and
and the heart isn't all that pure and we're
the the heart is confused with desire so much like there's so much ignorance and so much desire
we're overriding a pure being with our ignorance and our desire like then what how do we know like
when to follow that heartfelt instinct versus putting our trust in this idea of somebody being
perfect. Geshe-la tells us to ask for a sign of truth. So you could always use that as a way to
get another answer. Like what? Like, what would that look like? Well, you know, like when, you
know, for example, he told me I was supposed to go to India, I was chosen to go for this Ayurvedic
program. And I was going to go to the monastery, there was this big thing I was going to, and he
told me to go. And I didn't even know at this point if I had been chosen because they only chose
six people in North America. And he said, yes, you have to go. And when I was offered the opportunity,
I shut it down and I regret I'll never get that opportunity again. And now with COVID and
everything. So now looking back on it, I wish I would have asked for an act of truth because he
said, like, when you're doing things, you can do your practices and then you can say, okay, my
practice was what I believe it to be, then give me a sign that I was supposed, I'm supposed to go to
India or I'm supposed to. So it's like another way of confirming what the master is saying. And you
can, usually you'll see a sign pretty quickly, but I didn't apply it back then. And now that I know
of that, I think the next time I would use that just to give you your own heart of hearts to confirm
that did that make any sense you know like ask for a sign it makes it makes sense but what do
you like I've done that and signs don't come I mean it's great if they do if you get the big
flashing billboard sign saying yeah but then but then again you just said that sometimes like
I think you if I understood you properly I heard you say that sometimes you got to get out of your
way did you say that so then i think that you can also be in your own way for the signs as well
for sure i think you have to really make it a way to get out of your own way in the listening and in
the receiving and in the doing because the signs are always there it's like your whole world could
be a mandala right you just got to get out of the way
well when I was saying to tell no I was thinking like more
um things that are more challenging perhaps I think he was talking about that
if your teacher asks you to do something that it's you feel it's immoral don't do it
and about the rest of of asking other things
i don't know i think if you have the possibility to say yes and you feel you can do it
I'll give you an example. We're at Diamond Mountain. You know what it's like at Diamond Mountain. Remember the spring at the top of Diamond Mountain by the Lama House? You know, it's like very little water that comes out of it. The water in the desert tastes like dumpster fire.
And he's like, you should bottle that and sell it at yoga studios.
And then just kind of walked away.
Like, that is the dumbest idea I've ever heard.
There's very little water that comes out of it.
It tastes like hell.
And like the logistics of doing that and getting like an approved,
start a business and sell terrible tasting water to yoga studios.
Like what?
so then what do you do just take that as like on faith like that that's karmically gonna be
some sort of seed that i need to plant to continue seeing my teacher as a teacher or like what do you
do with that instruction maybe it was a teaching for you about the water's empty and that have you
maybe you could have bottled it in blue bottles and let it solar heat it there and then found a way
to market it in some way and maybe it tastes good
maybe but was it an order or a suggestion it was a suggestion
that happened several times at least twice that i remember
the first time i was just kind of like a deer in headlights like
i have no idea how to respond to that
just didn't compute and then he said it again and then i started thinking about
why the hell someone would ask me to do something like that
Sometimes I wonder too, if like, there's a couple of things on that, but sometimes I wonder too,
if there's things just to kill your ego a little bit, like if someone observes you and has a good
perception on you and they can kind of like hit that like in the button, like, oh yeah, Earl's
going to be so annoyed by this. Like, let's say this, like that triggers and alchemizes something
in you. And also in general, like with all of these things, with like Terry was saying around
danger of like doing something without having that internal dialogue, like intuition, you know,
like intuition has always got to be developed along with all of this. Because in the end,
you're the one that's developing yourself in this way. Like this person is here to guide you,
to support you with their knowledge, with their wisdom. And they're not you. You know,
you could do that thing of like, we're all one. But, you know, and like, and you're also you and
they're them in this experience right so intuition always
I I think I if I had the same experience that was difficult about the water because I don't get
that like that kind of instructions but I what I would do is I I would separate
what he said and from who it's coming from um so many parts of what he said is going to plant seeds
in me and so i would like try to get what i can get as something valuable for me to plant good
seeds of what he said so like acknowledging do you say acknowledging
that what he said is valuable and it's a teaching and it might my it is something really
special because of whom it's coming and keep it in my heart and knowing knowing that it is
something special so it's like from that side you're planting seeds of wisdom because you're not
being doubting of of what he said and the other part that is like being and how do you say and
like asking for help because I can't fully understand to take this to an action so part
of my seeds of doing what he said i just can't do it right now because i don't have the wisdom yet
so um asking for like i wish that the next time he tells me something i can do both things
but not discard the whole thing i don't know if if it makes sense
i'll share one more story and then i have to go and i don't think these are the common things
usually i think the things that are problematic like the next project that
we don't have time for and the struggles with things like that
but one time he i was with a friend talking to a friend that had traveled a lot with gishy michael
in new york they were and he said if i had a good student they would run head first as fast as they
could into that pole and my friend just kind of like that same deer caught in a headlight thing and
gisla just shook his head and laughed and walked away and like there's no good students anymore
or something like that like nobody understands guru yoga anymore something like that
but i think one thing to consider would be like
when we're able to see the person that we're trying to see in a highway
holy way divine way when we're holding that view nicely
it seems to work better to take that weird advice at those times and when our view of them is crap
And when they're appearing more normal and not as special and divine and sparkly, my experience is it doesn't work so well to jump and take those weird instructions.
Like there's a connection between how we're able to see them and jumping.
I got to go.
So nice to see everybody.
I love this discussion.
And Earl, don't jump.
Thank you, Earl.
See you in the morning.
What about Chrissy and Benji and Angelica?
What are you guys thinking about teachers
or this conversation?
I'm currently in this
like mentorship program. And so I have, I have a mentor. It's not like a teacher or a llama,
like the way they're referring to it. But however, I find it so valuable having this one person that
I can like refer to for anything. It's not just for meditation that I'm in the mentorship for.
It's just like, what a huge difference it makes when I have someone like that. So I can see the
value of um like following a teacher and like looking up to someone and really taking their
advice and following in the steps of someone who's done it and had all the experience
but yeah I was one of the people at the beginning of this call who said like
um that was one of the things that has stuck out to me the most in this training like the
importance. Like there's no point in doing it without having a teacher. So I'm looking at that
with like a fresh set of eyes right now. I don't know if you can tell I'm like avoiding giving my
answer. I'm like, anyone else want to talk? Um, for me, I think this is just such a, um,
polarizing topic because there's been so many negative stories in the past. Um,
I also think I'm kind of in a way like rebellious and I'm like, how is someone going to know,
like, you know, everything I should be doing, like I'm really resistant to it. But at the same
time that I have this kind of like, you know, resistance, I've had beautiful experiences where
I'm like, okay, my teacher told me to do something. I did it and it worked perfectly.
Like, yeah, just like trust in their knowledge, trust in what they're saying, you know? So
I guess, cook this for myself and find a way to kind of share this teaching with others.
Because right now, personally, I like do not feel comfortable. This would not be the verse that I
would want to teach to a yoga studio or like, yes, everyone find your teacher. Like I would not feel
like my foundation would be really shaky. So I don't know for me, I feel like I'm still cooking
this, this aspect. And I'm also thinking about, you know, how Geshe was saying that
your teacher should be somebody that's close to you, that you really have like a very,
you know, intimate relationship with where you see them a lot. You're able to serve them in
many everyday kind of tasks. So I'm, you know, wondering, you know, cause he said today like,
yes, I can be your teacher. I'm teaching you this book. I can be, you know, somebody that's
guiding you, but at the same time, I'm not your teacher who you're building a house for, who you're
cooking for, who you're doing, you know, all of these like day to day, you know, tasks for. So
I'm wondering if the master is more than one person, if we can, you know, have, have that,
or if it is just one person.
So I don't know.
For me, I'm definitely still like,
the crockpot is on low
and I will like let you guys know
when this one is like actually done for me.
I feel very similar to that, Lydia.
I feel that like very deeply.
I don't know.
Like I would be really shaky trying to teach this too
because I feel like, I don't know, like, am I the crazy one who just like, listens to the invisible?
Like who teaches, who guides and teaches the divine being? You know, is that just like a
true connection to the all knowing, the omnipresent? And that's just,
there's no separation between that type of teacher and like the knowing.
um i don't know i feel like if i was guided to have a teacher i would totally welcome it
um i've had like all these little teachers in my life like you're saying like can it be a collection
of all of this and i think like listening to that way and listening to like inspiration
or like the you know dharma and doing the practice and giving up everything to live that way
requires a certain level of impeccability because sometimes you you you can't hear properly
like you your ego gets in the way or the kleshas get in the way and so then doubt settles in and now
are you actually listening to the teacher who's trying to guide you or are you you know getting
carried away um just out of fear you know
yeah i just think that's like what the practice and the meditation is for right that's what the
teacher is for is for you to come into contact with your own innate wisdom and the aspect of you
that is all-knowing eventually you'll get to the same position it's just how long is it going to
take and how much are you willing to give and how willing are you going to be to be impeccable
to bring that about i don't know yeah
i'm wondering if we tie it a little bit oh tracy you want me to did you want to jump in sweetie
yeah i just wanted to say that um i like you and benji sharing what you were about teachers and
And for me, I didn't really understand enough about seeds to know, but something changed for me.
My dog had died and my dog was like my baby.
He was 16 years old.
And when I went the first time to Diamond Mountain, I stepped on a rattlesnake and I didn't know anything about lamb rim.
I thought I was going on a retreat.
I brought coloring books and markers for like I thought there was going to be like playtime and stuff.
and I stepped on a rattlesnake and I didn't get bit and I ended up getting a one-on-one with
Geshe-la and I told him about my dog and the stuff and I said something protected me and I didn't know
the name of the fence was called Boots and that was the name of my dog and Geshe-la said how do
you know your dog wasn't a Buddha and he said you actually were supposed to call him Buddha
and then he said you know um your llama can come to you as a dog and then it kind of like freaked
me out and when I got home from that retreat I almost died and my appendix ruptured and I went
to the doctor twice and doctors just said nothing was wrong with me and two weeks later Geshe Michael
Roach came to me transcendentally at 3 30 in the morning and said you need to call 9-1-1 now you
have appendicitis. And I called the ambulance 911. And sure enough, I was in a, they couldn't believe
I was still alive. And they told me that I should have been dead. So I just came back from Diamond
Mountain. I was grieving my dog named Boots. The fence was called Boots. And Geshe-la told me I
should have named him Buddha. And then Geshe-la is the one I look at it, like it saved my life.
So for me, I think too, like what Teresa was saying about when I hear him saying, you should
have somebody really close to you. The type of connection I have with Geshe is all transcendentally.
So I originally before was not having a human power to help guide me and be my master. And ever
since that experience, I have that type of communication that comes through that way.
And so that's been my experience. And so sometimes I don't know what to think of it because sometimes
I wish I was right there, close, serving him, cooking, building stuff.
But for me, that's my experience.
And I guess having such a profound experience, it's just when things happen and open up that
way, it changes everything.
So for me, that was kind of what happened with me.
Yeah, that's definitely beautiful.
I'm reminded in this moment of, I think Gesù is teaching the Lam Rim, and he just kind of states pretty clearly that like, you know, we're teaching about all these, like, he was referring to like, a certain sect of Buddhism that was teaching about deities.
And they're like, well, you know, we're teaching these deities to these people because they just don't really know how to sit and meditate.
Like they need, you know, all this crazy practice to be able to just do the thing that they don't know how to do yet.
And I'm wondering, too, is like this comes into chapter two and Patanjali is saying, well, you should pray to the master and you should seek the blessings of the master and to serve.
I think there's times in our life where it's just like we the kleshas are to a point of overriding
our simple ability to be in yoga I'm not saying simple ability what I mean to say is like
first chapter says here's yoga do you get it no okay well then maybe you should pray to a master
and serve a master and so at what point is it medicine that eventually you won't need anymore
you know we need that opportunity to serve something outside of ourselves
to come to the realization of in that connection to the wisdom and
you know is it an absolute must and I think I'm probably like Lydia here where I'm really
rambunctious and kind of rebellious so it would it would take quite a teacher to like
settle me down you know but yeah
I was I was just gonna throw out there like you know bringing it back yesterday we we talked about
planting the causes for it so what I'm taking away here right is this is definitely like a place where
all of us kind of are like wow maybe but like I don't sorry but I don't as a group I don't hear
us saying like, yes, we get this, we're doing this, like, you know, full force. So I'm wondering,
you know, today, even Geshla said, well, you know, planting the seeds for a teacher is helping other
people find their teacher. Like, what are your guys' ideas on that? Like, how can we help other
people find their teacher? Because if, for example, like Chrissy's saying like, wow, I really like,
you know, heard this in a new way. So like, if I want to plant my teacher, what is that going to
take? How am I going to help other people find their teacher? Like, what can I do on the cause
side instead of just fumbling around over here and the results of like, well, maybe I did it,
you know, like, what could we do on the causal side to be like, no, I'm going for this. I'm
going to get that teacher close. Could it be like sharing the, um, the trainings and the teachings,
like, because we're close to it, whether any of us on this call have a teacher ourselves,
it's like we we know what it takes to get one and we're like studying about other people who do have
the teachers so would it just be like planting the seeds to find that teacher by sharing the like the
same teachings that we have found so far I don't know that's the first thing that came to my mind
I want to share too um so after everything I just said like last year I was like being really whiny
and I was like if I just had a teacher that I could see and I could talk to every day and I
would be so happy and like maybe I would get over this stuff you know and then this opportunity
came up it was like you need to go teach these kids out in the wilderness and it's going to be
a hell realm and it's really going to suck but you really need to do it if you want to have your
teacher like okay so I went to go do that I was like all right by the time your birthday rolls
around you'll probably be done and on my birthday Lydia sent me an email said hey do you want to
you want to teach yoga at YSI and I was like yeah absolutely and I think like like what Christy is
saying like the best way is like go teach go to the hell realm to teach go and teach kids who don't
who don't know and could just like be a big brother or be a big sister and give that opportunity and
be a mentor and then your teacher will come yeah I also think that Geshe-la when he does a lot of the
meditations and trainings on it I like how he starts at the basis of you know your mom was
your first teacher like you might have had a teacher in school like and so he starts like
building the layers of gratitude of anybody who's taught you so I think sometimes if you encourage
people like on a foundation starting with ground zero and then from there you can kind of build it
up but I don't think you have to start dung-ho about just the master I think like baby steps of
like you know in looking at those teaching moments to help you in hopes to one day find the master
and teacher might help people to not feel so overwhelmed by what do you mean I have to find a
master yes I agree what Tracy and everybody was saying maybe just use more with other people the
world the word teacher make it more common in a sense that when we leave school or university we
don't if you well we do but if you're just working and have your family it's teacher it's not
something that you use as a word you don't have any more teachers so just saying the word teacher
whenever you talk to a friend and he had a problem and this happened and someone came and told me
this and you can just put the word oh look he was like a teacher for you or this bird that came and
made this to you oh he was like a teacher and make it like a more common uh word in people's
mind and to think that the the teacher thing can be something they can still have in their life
yeah i definitely oh go ahead benji i just wanted to say like maybe just
giving gratitude to things that are much bigger than you like the earth
you know the things that comprise our very existence the elements all that stuff
i literally just did a meditation on that today when i looked at the homework question and they
were talking about like divine beings i was like thinking about like the plants and nature as these
divine beings so that's so cool you mentioned that
today I just feel super grateful for all of you being here I think of all the talks I think this
one actually might be the one that I'm like oh I got a lot to like yeah to work on to process to
think about to do like so thank you all so much for coming and accompanying us and I really just
wish that all of you find your your teacher and that we all just you know find that that guidance
thank you warm fuzzy meeting loved it thank you Lydia for your your all your hard work you are
like everywhere this week has I don't we said at the very beginning but like dude this 10 days this
course has been so much more than I ever thought it was going to be. So thank you. I will see all
of you tomorrow for yoga in the morning. I don't even know who to plug. I'm sorry. No, I do. Alex
is giving Lady Naguma yoga in the morning and Rachel is giving meditation. So day nine, see you guys
tomorrow. Have a wonderful evening. See you. Bye. Bye.